Pioneered by Dr. Sue Johnson and Dr. Les Greenberg, emotionally focused therapy (EFT) is an approach to couples’ therapy based on decades of science and empirical research. EFT is typically provided on a short-term basis of anywhere from 10 to 20 sessions and helps couples explore their patterns of communication and connection.

EFT has a clearly defined framework: it features at least nine specific steps and three “phases” that the therapist uses to guide and track the couple’s progress. EFT also looks at love through the lens of attachment bond. This concept comes from the broader lens of attachment theory, which is rooted in the childhood experience.

According to attachment theory, patterns of connection are established from an early age and influence the degree to which someone can feel safe and secure in their bond with another person. For example, a young child who is raised by an emotionally unavailable or unreliable parent is likely to feel distressed and unsafe in the parent/child relationship. This can cause the child to learn coping mechanisms and behavioral patterns that aren’t conducive to fostering healthy bonds with others. As an adult, this person may continue to exhibit these learned behaviors and patterns and therefore feel distressed and unsafe with their partner.

Of course, in any couple there could be not just one both two people dealing with these challenging, childhood-based patterns! In this way, EFT acts as the bridge that attempts to help both partners unearth their learned patterns, build trust, and learn how to connect in a healthier and more secure way.