Hi! I'm a healthy relationship. I might not look exactly like what you had in mind. In fact, I might even look quite different when I'm with different couples, depending on those individuals' personalities and preferences. And I can even change and evolve over time with the same two people! But there are some important traits and characteristics that you'll definitely notice about me. A Healthy …Read More
When you argue with your spouse, does it ever feel like Groundhog Day? Do you ever shake your head in disbelief, wondering why you're having this same disagreement yet again? Hitting the same marital roadblock over and over may relate to a perpetual problem between you and your spouse. Perpetual problems—which even healthy couples have—are difficult if not impossible to solve (though not …Read More
Do things feel heavy to you right now? They do for me, too. When so many difficult issues are going on in the world—including the environment, Afghanistan, politics, COVID-1, and the mental health crisis—it can sometimes feel like you're shouldering these burdens on your own. And even with a supportive spouse, it can be tricky figuring out how to create healthy conversations about these tou…Read More
Do you ever get angry at your spouse? For most of us, the answer is a resounding yes. We're human, after all, and anger is a normal human emotion. But while feeling angry isn't inherently bad, anger can have a negative impact on your marriage if it's not dealt with well. When You're Angry and You Know It: Why it's Normal and What To Do (And NOT Do) About It If you have this idea that healthy c…Read More
Just about everyone has been impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic in some way. For couples with kids, the added stress of homeschooling (even while working full-time from home), raised tensions from close and frequent contact, and generalized anxiety about the uncertain times can seem overwhelming. To avoid getting overwhelemed during this transition—and to help your children feeling overwhelmed,…Read More
Imagine this scenario: You notice your partner seems anxious about something. You're not sure what's going on, but all day they've been acting agitated and on edge. How do you respond? Is there a part of you that begins to worry or perceive their mood as a rejection of you? What do you say to your partner about your concerns—if anything? Do you reach out, even if you're not sure how? Part…Read More
It's not hard to imagine how negativity can be damaging for a healthy relationship. The problem is, we see so many examples of negative interactions between couples—on television, in movies, and in "real life"—that nagging, teasing, criticizing, or speaking poorly of our partners (even if you're "just joking") can start to seem like normal behavior. And sure, maybe negativity is "normal" or a…Read More
Being friends with your spouse is a gift and directly benefits you both. As relationship researcher and psychologist Dr. John Gottman has said, "Happy marriages are based on a deep friendship." But all too often, as couples deepen their bond and spend more and more time together, the other friendships they had prior to the primary relationship start to fall away. Is this a bad thing? Not necess…Read More
Every relationship has its conflicts and communication issues. But not all relationship problems are created equal. Research from esteemed psychologist and relationship expert Dr. John Gottman reveals at least four characteristics which tend to spell serious trouble for intimate partners. So damaging are their effects that together they've earned an ominous nickname—The Four Horsemen. But while…Read More
Don’t let the pressure of Hallmark’s cheery, over-the-top and in-your-face holiday campaigns fool you. For many, this time of year can take even MORE work to pull off a successful season ahead. With increased stress to get along with family members, pick the most well thought-out gift and keep holiday cheer at a maximum, it’s no wonder that some families crash and burn each time. Families ha…Read More